 More trouble than they’re worth?
Coaching the ‘top dog’.
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Pettiness, nastiness and demeaning behaviours often pervade our working day and
can ultimately undermine our job satisfaction. Some workplaces seem to foster
arrogant jerks and either ignore, forgive or even encourage nastiness. Quite
often the productive, but abusive employee is tolerated. Bullies, jerks or
egomaniacs? Whatever we call them, many appear clueless about their behaviour.
Even worse, some of them are proud of it. Other jerks seem to be troubled and
embarrassed by their behaviour, but can’t seem to contain or control their
meaness or outbursts. All are similar, however in that they infuriate, demean,
and damage their peers, superiors, reports, and at times, clients and customers
too.
The most common behavioural style of these
people is an obsession with winning – even if it is trivial, not worth their
time or even to their disadvantage, they often try to win anyway. Quite often
these people are male and highly successful - they are smart and they believe
that their insights are unique so put complete faith in their instincts. They
view their clients as potential conquests; approach negotiations in terms of
win/lose and focus on the immediate transaction rather than the long term
relationship.
Their other behavioural style is one of
‘power’ – they come off as being arrogant and inflexible and want to control
their customer’s dependence on them for their expertise, product or information.
While these behaviours may see them become successful, their relationships with
their clients are usually short term with little likelihood of getting repeat
business or others recommending them to other potential clients.
They dictate rather than guide, and deal with
their staff in an aggressive and forceful way and they think that motivation and
performance improvement involves pointing out mistakes, being critical and
dismissing ideas due to minor flaws. They are intimidating, which makes learning
from them difficult. They are judgemental of colleagues who can’t control
emotions, yet they openly vent their frustration or anger and then dismiss these
outbursts, arguing that the same rules don’t apply to the ‘boss’ or ‘top dog’.
The downside to this behaviour is that they are often stressed and have very
poor personal relationships; quite often their success is short-lived.
Businesses become dysfunctional when people
avoid dealing with this difficult person, work around him or simply pay him lip
service.
So what can be done to assist these people to
improve their behavioural style and build a more positive workplace culture?
Many small businesses turn to ‘business coaches’ for advice, but this is a
primitive field with many coaches being ‘accredited’ by commercial providers,
without any educational psychology underpinnings. Many ‘coaches’ will say they
can address any problem you have when they really have no business trying to fix
problems they know little about. Most are the ‘more sizzle – than steak’ variety
espousing platitudes such as “work on your business - not in it” and “if ya fail
to plan - ya plan to fail”.
These people require skilled coaches because
the coaching process can make them feel unproductive and out of control. They
haven’t achieved their success through self-reflection and they often fail to
see that it is their own communication style creating difficulties, rather than
someone else’s shortcomings. They are stubborn and resist feedback, its
difficult for them to ask for help.
Good coaching enhances the person’s
effectiveness by preserving their strengths and their focus on results while
correcting weaknesses. 360 degree feedback is essential as it provides
credible, consistent data that helps the person step outside their style to see
themselves as others do. It provides a wake-up call by presenting undeniable
evidence that his current behaviour doesn’t work nearly as well as he thinks it
does. Including superiors and co-workers is essential as usually they have
managed around the behaviour which in turn has perpetuated it. The key to
lasting change requires the entire business to alter how they behave, rather
than simply treating an individual problem.
Our clients usually ask how long our coaching
process takes and what kinds of interim results can they expect. The answer
varies according to the individual’s commitment to change, the organisation and
how involved they are in the process. For some, a 360-degree assessment followed
by one or two coaching sessions is sufficient for noticeable change. For others,
who are less self-aware, it may require three months of coaching sessions before
changes in behaviour are evident.
This publication is provided by way of
general guidance only and is not to be
construed by the reader as legal advice or
as a recommendation to take a particular
course of action in the conduct of their
business or personal affairs. You should not
rely upon the material as a basis for action
that may expose you to a legal liability,
injury, loss or damage and it is recommended
that you obtain your own legal advice
relevant to your particular circumstances.
Savvy Human Resources Associates Pty Ltd and
their agents Disclaims All Liability For Any
Loss Or Injury Suffered, Howsoever Caused,
As A Result of Relying Upon The Content Of
This Publication In The Making Of Any
Commercial Or Personal Legal Decisions.
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